*points to title* yeah...XD it's been, what, almost a month now? and a lot of stuff has happened...*sigh* i don't really feel like going through it all, it'll take quite a while.
but, in short: i have 1 final left, snowbama days, chinese new year, bday plus all state. :)
anyway i decided to get back to my blog today b/c i was starting to feel depressed...again. -.- even though i thought it was getting a bit better, the stupid loneliness feeling came back. part of it was my fault, i was being a nosy stalker.
i really really want to go to enloe...the school is so much better than pchs and it seems like a lot of people go there, and they all know each other and form little groups and all that. i think it started with tacas, b/c (almost) all the symphony people go there. i still feel like i'm left out, i don't fit in perfectly with any one group...i have so many scattered friends and no bffs yet, it makes me sad...
my parents are encouraging me to get in ncssm, and to do that i have to get a really good sat score. so they're making me study lots and lots of vocab. i should be able to get a perfect on the math, i just have to concentrate and reading.
so yeah...i think that's pretty much all for now. i've been playing pet society a lot to take my mind off things, it's just repetitive clicking...but i did figure out a really good strategy to get more paw points, even though you lose some money. i go to the cafe and go down the row of pets, visiting them and raising all 3 of their health, hygiene, and happiness bars. for food i use apples...once i've visited all the pets then i save and restart. i've earned like 3000 points today.
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Sunday, December 28, 2008
tacas
i just got back from a tacas rehearsal. the sad thing is i don't even know what tacas stands for, i think it's some triangle chinese association...anyway they have an orchestra and my violin teacher is the conductor, so i play in it too. i just joined in...october-ish? i still don't know everyone's names, maybe like 5 people XD we play a lot of chinese songs and some christmas stuff. we don't even have concerts, we just have "performances" where we're invited to play background music at public events. boring...
i'm trying for all state and then triangle youth philharmonic next year, i think they'll be much better.
i'm trying for all state and then triangle youth philharmonic next year, i think they'll be much better.
Saturday, December 27, 2008
stride gum
i'm chewing a piece of stride gum right now, forever fruit flavor. it reminds me of my birthday party last year b/c that night i had a pack of this gum too and everyone took some. all of my good friends came to that party (except for one, but she was out of state).
i'm probably not going to have a party this year. i do have enough friends to have probably a somewhat successful party, but i don't really feel like it. besides, on my birthday this year i have all state auditions and i'm going to be really nervous. my mom wants me to make it in and be the concertmaster, but i'm only a freshman! i can't really go against those juniors and seniors who've been playing for longer than i have.
i'm probably not going to have a party this year. i do have enough friends to have probably a somewhat successful party, but i don't really feel like it. besides, on my birthday this year i have all state auditions and i'm going to be really nervous. my mom wants me to make it in and be the concertmaster, but i'm only a freshman! i can't really go against those juniors and seniors who've been playing for longer than i have.
Friday, December 26, 2008
merry christmas
haha i know it's actually the day after christmas, but i have to wish a merry christmas to my faithful followers (cough cough kira) I LOVE YOU!!!
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
vampire knight...yaoi???
for those of you who don't know japanese or aren't familiar with some of these terms, yaoi basically means gay, and yuri is lesbian...personally i don't have anything against gay people but in vampire knight??? not cool!
i saw a couple of different "tributes" for kaname/zero, kaname/aidou, and ichijo/shiki, but i think they're all HORRIBLE. sure the guys in vk are pretty hot, but that's just too...gay is the only word for it.
there is a gay guy in my algebra class and after the recent seating arrangement i was sitting next to him. in the very beginning of the year i was across the room from him, and i really couldn't tell if he was a boy or a girl because he was short and had a really high voice, but i was leaning towards boy. then one of my friends told me he was gay, and it all made sense.
i hadn't really met/talked to a gay person before. in 7th grade my science teacher was a lesbian, except i didn't realize that either until my friends told me about it. i just never thought about it. on the news the same sex stuff always seems to happen in california for some reason, so i didn't think it'd be part of my life at all...ignorant, kinda.
but the gay guy in my class is pretty cool. he matches up pretty well with the stereotypes, he likes to act and sing in musicals. i've heard that it's fun to have a gay friend (as a girl) b/c they're fun to go shopping with and they also think other guys are cute.
back to my original topic anyway...there are plenty of other yaoi manga out there so stop making weird pairings in vampire knight! it annoys me. the pairings i like are yuuki/zero, yuuki/kaname, akatsuki/ruka, shiki/rima. :)
i saw a couple of different "tributes" for kaname/zero, kaname/aidou, and ichijo/shiki, but i think they're all HORRIBLE. sure the guys in vk are pretty hot, but that's just too...gay is the only word for it.
there is a gay guy in my algebra class and after the recent seating arrangement i was sitting next to him. in the very beginning of the year i was across the room from him, and i really couldn't tell if he was a boy or a girl because he was short and had a really high voice, but i was leaning towards boy. then one of my friends told me he was gay, and it all made sense.
i hadn't really met/talked to a gay person before. in 7th grade my science teacher was a lesbian, except i didn't realize that either until my friends told me about it. i just never thought about it. on the news the same sex stuff always seems to happen in california for some reason, so i didn't think it'd be part of my life at all...ignorant, kinda.
but the gay guy in my class is pretty cool. he matches up pretty well with the stereotypes, he likes to act and sing in musicals. i've heard that it's fun to have a gay friend (as a girl) b/c they're fun to go shopping with and they also think other guys are cute.
back to my original topic anyway...there are plenty of other yaoi manga out there so stop making weird pairings in vampire knight! it annoys me. the pairings i like are yuuki/zero, yuuki/kaname, akatsuki/ruka, shiki/rima. :)
caught red handed :O
contrary to popular belief, i am NOT the goody two shoes everyone thinks i am. XD
on monday night i got caught for lying b/c i told my parents i'd played ddr but really i hadn't, and they could tell b/c the mat was rolled up and the ps2 was off...so...i should do a better job of making up evidence next time...just kidding.
i don't usually lie, but sometimes little ones will slip out...so then i got "punished" by not being able to use the computer all day yesterday. of course my parents wouldn't be able to know if i'd used it or not, but i have a pretty strong conscience/self control so i made it through the day without even going in this room. ^_^
but of course i'm back on today :D
on monday night i got caught for lying b/c i told my parents i'd played ddr but really i hadn't, and they could tell b/c the mat was rolled up and the ps2 was off...so...i should do a better job of making up evidence next time...just kidding.
i don't usually lie, but sometimes little ones will slip out...so then i got "punished" by not being able to use the computer all day yesterday. of course my parents wouldn't be able to know if i'd used it or not, but i have a pretty strong conscience/self control so i made it through the day without even going in this room. ^_^
but of course i'm back on today :D
Monday, December 22, 2008
vampire knight 46
i just reread chap 46 of vampire knight for the 3rd time...it's so intense and sad...like i'm so happy that zero confessed and that he and yuuki finally kissed <3 kawaii!
if i had to choose between kaname and zero, i'd go zero 100%. there's nothing that special about kaname in my opinion. but i think yuuki is supposed to belong to kaname, unless something goes way wrong later in the manga, which could happen. a lot of the times the main character girl doesn't end up with the guy she loves in the beginning...well i wish i knew what the author was thinking.
this also reminds me of twilight. (the movie sucked, btw) if it was me as bella, i would probably choose jacob over edward. i know there are a lot of people who disagree with me on that. XD so i wish jacob didn't imprint on reneesme, it leaves no chance for fangirls. :P
but that's only if they're real...if my life was a manga it'd be the most boring one i've ever read.
if i had to choose between kaname and zero, i'd go zero 100%. there's nothing that special about kaname in my opinion. but i think yuuki is supposed to belong to kaname, unless something goes way wrong later in the manga, which could happen. a lot of the times the main character girl doesn't end up with the guy she loves in the beginning...well i wish i knew what the author was thinking.
this also reminds me of twilight. (the movie sucked, btw) if it was me as bella, i would probably choose jacob over edward. i know there are a lot of people who disagree with me on that. XD so i wish jacob didn't imprint on reneesme, it leaves no chance for fangirls. :P
but that's only if they're real...if my life was a manga it'd be the most boring one i've ever read.
the big move
i think i should explain tbm b/c it's such a huge deal in my life right now.
it basically started last year around october, i suppose. my dad found some sort of job ad and told my mom about it. it was a job at a company called syngenta, which is in the research triangle park in north carolina. that was about 1,000 miles from missouri, the mid-west, all the way to the east coast.
the weird part is, five months ago from then (may) we'd gone to visit rtp, and now my parents are suggesting that we move there. my mom replied to the job and went on an interview in november. we were expecting her to get the job with no problems.
of course, i didn't want to leave at all. i had lots of friends at school and we had sleepovers and parties every other weekend. but as soon as my mom got the notice that gave her the job, my parents started making plans to move. we made lots of revisions to the plan. originally i was going to leave with my mom during winter break and leave my dad in missouri to sell the house. i would just finish the rest of my school year at a new school. afterwards we changed it so that i would stay with my dad and just my mom would leave.
while we were making these plans, i was actually getting kind of excited. my parents were telling me all these wonderful things about raleigh and being in a big city as opposed to a little country town with only two high schools. they printed out these statistics from high schools and let me choose which one i wanted to go to. it seemed almost cool, very different.
so i was to leave on the last day of school at noon. by then all of my friends knew that i was moving, so i hugged everyone before i left. as i walked out the front door and got into the car, it was the first time i actually realized that i was MOVING, and LEAVING my home of five years. it hit me like a train at full speed, and at that point i started tearing up. my parents took me to a restaurant for lunch, as a sort of farewell to the wonderful little town. it was one of my favorite buffets, but i couldn't really enjoy it at all b/c i kept thinking that it'd be a long time before i could see the faces of my friends again.
about a month before, i'd made a facebook b/c they were all urging me to "keep in touch." facebook is almost like a huge lie, maybe a little better than myspace. your "friends" aren't really friends, more like people you recognize and know the names of. some people put false pictures on there. you have to watch what you do and say, b/c facebook is like a stalker and w/e you do pops up on your wall or minfeed. just last week someone was killed by four high school students, and a lot of it happened b/c of what came up on facebook. despite all of that, yes i still have one. only about 7 of my friends still talk to me, the rest just moved on with their lives. of course, i can't blame them, it's not like i had such a big impact anyway. i'm just glad my real friends are still with me.
my friend situation here in north carolina has improved slightly...from the dinner party post you can tell i'm sorta "wallowing in self pity." i'd rather be lonely than attempt to make fake friends.
anime is a great distraction. i have these "phases" where i become obsessed with a certain series then it fades as i start watching another one. it's fun and relaxing, though it does mess with my head sometimes.
it basically started last year around october, i suppose. my dad found some sort of job ad and told my mom about it. it was a job at a company called syngenta, which is in the research triangle park in north carolina. that was about 1,000 miles from missouri, the mid-west, all the way to the east coast.
the weird part is, five months ago from then (may) we'd gone to visit rtp, and now my parents are suggesting that we move there. my mom replied to the job and went on an interview in november. we were expecting her to get the job with no problems.
of course, i didn't want to leave at all. i had lots of friends at school and we had sleepovers and parties every other weekend. but as soon as my mom got the notice that gave her the job, my parents started making plans to move. we made lots of revisions to the plan. originally i was going to leave with my mom during winter break and leave my dad in missouri to sell the house. i would just finish the rest of my school year at a new school. afterwards we changed it so that i would stay with my dad and just my mom would leave.
while we were making these plans, i was actually getting kind of excited. my parents were telling me all these wonderful things about raleigh and being in a big city as opposed to a little country town with only two high schools. they printed out these statistics from high schools and let me choose which one i wanted to go to. it seemed almost cool, very different.
so i was to leave on the last day of school at noon. by then all of my friends knew that i was moving, so i hugged everyone before i left. as i walked out the front door and got into the car, it was the first time i actually realized that i was MOVING, and LEAVING my home of five years. it hit me like a train at full speed, and at that point i started tearing up. my parents took me to a restaurant for lunch, as a sort of farewell to the wonderful little town. it was one of my favorite buffets, but i couldn't really enjoy it at all b/c i kept thinking that it'd be a long time before i could see the faces of my friends again.
about a month before, i'd made a facebook b/c they were all urging me to "keep in touch." facebook is almost like a huge lie, maybe a little better than myspace. your "friends" aren't really friends, more like people you recognize and know the names of. some people put false pictures on there. you have to watch what you do and say, b/c facebook is like a stalker and w/e you do pops up on your wall or minfeed. just last week someone was killed by four high school students, and a lot of it happened b/c of what came up on facebook. despite all of that, yes i still have one. only about 7 of my friends still talk to me, the rest just moved on with their lives. of course, i can't blame them, it's not like i had such a big impact anyway. i'm just glad my real friends are still with me.
my friend situation here in north carolina has improved slightly...from the dinner party post you can tell i'm sorta "wallowing in self pity." i'd rather be lonely than attempt to make fake friends.
anime is a great distraction. i have these "phases" where i become obsessed with a certain series then it fades as i start watching another one. it's fun and relaxing, though it does mess with my head sometimes.
lunchtime
it's 11:30 now, i'm getting hungry so i think i'm going to eat lunch soon.
i wanna keep watching vampire knight though. i'm on ep 10 of the first season. i'm watching them kinda slowly b/c i keep going back to the manga and comparing them. they actually did an amazing job on the anime b/c the lines match up almost exactly. usually they completely screw up the anime by messing with the plot and the lines, but i love this one.
i wanna keep watching vampire knight though. i'm on ep 10 of the first season. i'm watching them kinda slowly b/c i keep going back to the manga and comparing them. they actually did an amazing job on the anime b/c the lines match up almost exactly. usually they completely screw up the anime by messing with the plot and the lines, but i love this one.
2nd post
i couldn't think of a title for this one so i just settled for the boring old "2nd post." so sorry for whoever's reading this...probably no one anyway.
so since i already mentioned last night's dinner party i guess i should start with that first. well, chinese people have this habit of gathering together for these huge dinner parties. it's sorta like a potluck where everyone brings a dish. after eating the men play cards and the women gossip or sing karaoke. and the little kids play together.
so what do the teenagers do? well most of the time they would hang out and play video games or go online. but that's only if they're friends.
since TBM (the big move, i think i'll be using this a lot) it's been weird having to make friends and meet new people. last night i think i just wasn't in the mood. plus they were all older than me, upperclassmen and college students. my mom wanted to drag me there, but the more she pushed the more i resisted. i hate being the youngest of the group, and it seems like everyone hates freshman too. the whole time i was asking my mom when we would leave. such a boring and lonely dinner party...
so since i already mentioned last night's dinner party i guess i should start with that first. well, chinese people have this habit of gathering together for these huge dinner parties. it's sorta like a potluck where everyone brings a dish. after eating the men play cards and the women gossip or sing karaoke. and the little kids play together.
so what do the teenagers do? well most of the time they would hang out and play video games or go online. but that's only if they're friends.
since TBM (the big move, i think i'll be using this a lot) it's been weird having to make friends and meet new people. last night i think i just wasn't in the mood. plus they were all older than me, upperclassmen and college students. my mom wanted to drag me there, but the more she pushed the more i resisted. i hate being the youngest of the group, and it seems like everyone hates freshman too. the whole time i was asking my mom when we would leave. such a boring and lonely dinner party...
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